March Musings on Babies

For this issue (March 2008), we focus on babies. Portland has been recognized by such publications as Fit Pregnancy as the best place to have them. Welcome to the bandwagon, world! They can list all the doulas and yoga centers and classes and shops, and it's true, Portland abounds with resources galore for new parents. What no guide can list, though, is the most important resource of all for new mothers – the other mothers.

When I had my first baby, I was lucky to get connected with a group of fabulous women who all had their babies within weeks of my daughter. Every week, we'd get together to swap stories, trade tips, and just be with people who could totally relate to what we were going through. Because of this shared experience, for those first months, these women were in many ways closer to me than my dearest friends. We took the above photo when our babies were about five months old – just before they really got moving.

I'll never forget that day in my city apartment; the place was a heap of enormous diaper bags, car seats, strollers, purses, blankets, and toys. We did not travel light at that stage! After getting all the beans changed and fed, we propped them up on the couch. With much bribing, singing and clapping, we got them to sit still. For a few moments.

Of course, no baby stays still for long; they just keep moving and growing. My second child (my baby) turns three this month, a milestone I just can't get my head around. That fierce independence he has been cultivating for the past year is now realized, and cries for "I'll do it!!" have subsided as he just, well, does it. There's certainly a freedom that comes with three - no more diapers, for one. No more getting in the pool for mommy-and-me classes, no more naps even, sometimes. There are a few more minutes to my day, yes, but also, no more baby. Coming to the end of that phase is not easy, and frankly, I am not all the way there. So if you happen upon me with your wee one in your carrier or tucked away in a stroller, forgive me for staring a bit too long. You'll be in my shoes soon. Too soon.